Be True to You

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Being true to yourself is often much harder than it sounds but immensely liberating in the longer run. This week. I\’d like to continue the theme I started with the recent post \’Start on the Inside\’.

[box type=\”shadow\”]\”Your only obligation in any lifetime is to be true to yourself. Being true to anyone else or anything else is not only impossible, but the mark of a fake messiah.\”

– Richard Bach

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External pressures

With all the external pressures, demands and challenges we all face in the modern world, it\’s hardly surprising that many of us find ourselves, in the quiet times, wondering just who we really are and what\’s important to us.

For those who go to work each day, there is pressure to conform to the expectations of employers, managers and team leaders, not to mention peers.

In each of our communities there exists a subtle but definite pressure to adhere to, and be seen to adhere to, standards and norms of behaviour deemed acceptable to the broader group

In our social circles it is common to feel a certain amount of pressure to be liked or approved of or to act in some way that \’pleases\’ others.

Even at home there is a – perhaps less intrusive – yet still evident pressure to meet the needs and expectations of one\’s spouse, partner or family members.

Chameleon-life persona

The result of all of this external pressure is that many of us develop chameleon-like persona that adapt to the situations and groups that we find ourselves in.

Is this wrong?

No, not necessarily. It is, admittedly, a very effective coping mechanism for some. Others would even go so far as to say that it is the \’secret to success\’.

And I agree … if you measure success by how perfectly you think the outside world perceives you!

Another way to measure success

But there is another, altogether more satisfying way to measure of success. And that\’s by the degree to which you feel you are being true to you.

In other words, to what extent are you a true representation of yourself in any given situation? To what extent are you living authentically in line with your purpose, your values and your beliefs?

Living authentically – or being true to who you are is certainly not easy, in the face of all the pressure you face to conform to the expectations of others, is it?

A false concept

Not easy at all … that is, until you realise that \’the expectations of others\’ is a shallow, even false concept.

The reason I say this is because so many of the \’others\’ are, themselves, living lives that are inauthentic, constantly reacting and adapting to what they perceive is expected of them.

Devin Iyer, writer, philosopher and artist – and good friend of mine, talks compellingly about life being \’an illusion\’.

Indeed, our experiences of life and our views on it are fundamentally different from person to person. That\’s because our perspectives on life – and the \’mental maps\’ that we use to decipher what we see and experience – are all unique.

Simply an illusion

Because of this there can never be one single common and collective appreciation of what life is or what it means. Any perception that this exists is simply an illusion.

If this resonates with you, you may start to appreciate how futile it is to live life in accordance with what you think others expect of you.

And, hopefully, you may be tempted to start living life according to what you expect of you.

This approach is bound to evoke criticism from others but you should welcome that as an endorsement of the courageous step you have taken to embrace your uniqueness and live authentically.

It is the way to true fulfillment and happiness.

 

 

3 thoughts on “Be True to You”

  1. It’s so true Bill!

    I always remember 2 quotes:
    “All you can do is all you can do and all you can do is enough, but make sure you do all you can do”
    and
    “You can only be the very best YOU as everybody else is taken anyway”.

    Besides, life gets amazing once you know who you are and get to live on purpose, attracting the very people and experiences that juice you up as the doubters, naysayers and energy vampires naturally fall by the wayside.

    Alain
    Author of “The Essential Success Mindset Guide”, FREE at http://www.AlainBalanche.com

  2. If we can just get there to realize that who we are, are more than “good enough”! Just be the best you can be, and not the best in the world…

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