The Golden Rule of Life

One thing we try hard not to do at New Insights is to be overly rigid about expecting our trainee life coaches to embrace the principles that we advocate. After all, one of the foundation stones for effective life coaching is having a deep tolerance and appreciation for the different values and beliefs that people may hold.

That said, there are a few important principles that underpin our philosophy.

One of these is that all of us were born into this world with a two-part precious gift, namely an open mind and a free will.

But this wonderful gift comes with a ‘condition of use’ – and that is what I like to refer to as ‘The Golden Rule of Life’.

“We know what we are but not what we may be.”

– William Shakespeare

Golden Rule of Life

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Know Your Values, Increase Your Happiness

I watched a reality TV show last night featuring couples who are experiencing marital issues. At one point I found myself nodding my head and smiling wryly.

One of the partners in a couple featured on the programme was engaged in a one on one discussion with a relationship coach.

The coach asked her to sum up the nub of the relationship problem, to which she answered: “We just seem to have different values.” The coach probed for more information: “What exactly are your top values?”

At this point, the woman started to stutter and stammer before, in a questioning manner, finally spitting out a few generic values, while eyeing the coach for approval.

“It’s not hard to make decisions once you know what your values are.”

– Roy E. Disney

Know your values

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Life Coaching Opens Eyes

Life coaching can be described or explained in many ways.

Here’s one description that I coined:

“Life coaching involves a programme of sessions or mini-interventions that help empower individuals to grow and develop rapidly through exposure to tools and techniques that assist them to open their eyes to what really is possible for them to be do and have.”

What I like about this particular description is the reference to the ‘opening of eyes’ that takes place during coaching.

Effective life coaching can bring about dramatically positive changes in the lives of people simply by getting them to see themselves and the world around them from bright and exciting new perspectives.

“The most important thing in life is to stop saying ‘I wish’ and start saying ‘I will’. Consider nothing impossible, then treat possibilities as probabilities.”

– Charles Dickens

life coaching

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Ten Steps To a Better You

Just the other day someone sent me an email thanking me for a Blog post that had resonated with them. I was about to send a brief reply with well wishes when I realised there was more to the message.

“Can you recommend ways in which I can better myself?”

“Boy,” I thought, “This is a tough one given that I don’t know the person concerned from a bar of soap!”

My mischievous nature felt inclined to respond: “Read a further nine blog posts” but then I reasoned that this person might not appreciate my taste in humour.

Then I thought: “If I’m going to invest the time to respond with something meaningful I may as well leverage that investment by creating a Blog post!”

So, dear readers, let me share my reply … Ten steps to a better you.

“I think life gives you lemons, and the thing that I’m working on doing is not watering it down, not putting sugar in it. Just drink it straight. The more you can take life head on… it’s gonna make you a better person, and then you have nothing left to be afraid of. And what an awesome way to live. “

– Cam (American musician)

Ten steps to a better you

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Don’t Judge a Book by its Cover

‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’, the wise old adage goes. Its just such a pity that this sage advice goes unheeded so often.

I guess we can all lay claim to having experienced being judged or, if we are honest, judging others unfairly for what we see on the outside.

So, why exactly is it that people rush to criticize or find fault with others without really knowing them or understanding what’s going on in their lives?

The answer, to a very large extent, lies in our values and the unique set of rules we apply to determine whether we (or anyone else) are living up to our values.

That may sound strange but we all have unwritten rules that we unconsciously apply to pretty much every situation in our lives. And the rules that we apply to our values can play a powerful role in how we judge ourselves and others, and ultimately how happy we allow ourselves to be.

“Who are you to judge the life I live? I know I’m not perfect – and I don’t live to be – but before you start pointing fingers… … make sure you hands are clean!”

– Bob Marley

Don't judge a book by its cover

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Understanding Values

Very simply put, your personal values are those things that you value or judge to be important in life.

This includes principles, ideals, standards of behaviour and ways of doing things that you believe should be upheld or adhered to.

“Your beliefs become your thoughts, Your thoughts become your words,Your words become your actions,Your actions become your habits,Your habits become your values,Your values become your destiny.”

– Mahatma Gandhi

 

understanding values

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